That is what it is all about for me.
I didn’t run a single step for 3 weeks while trying to get my life in order. My thought patterns went like this.
- I gotta get out for a run, but I am so tired and everyone is sick in the house.
- There is just too much to do right now
- I’ll be able to catch up
- The virtual marathon isn’t the same as the Vancouver Marathon, so I don’t give a shit if it takes me 6 hours to complete
- I’ll be fine when I start up again
- Man, that was another Sunday gone by wasn’t it…
- I am so tired.
- It’s just too hard. Why even bother anymore.
- Gawd I’m gaining weight
- Well, i’m not running tomorrow anyway, might as well have a coke float.
- Well, i’m not running tomorrow anyway, might as well have a plate of nachos.
- Well, i’m not running tomorrow anyway, might as well have an ice cream.
- Well, i’m not running tonight anyway, might as well have McDonalds for lunch.
- Well, i’m not running tonight anyway, might as well have Dairy Queen for lunch.
- Well, i’m not running tonight anyway, might as well have a burger and fries for lunch.
- Well, i’m not running tonight anyway, might as well have the fish and chips for lunch.
- Well, i’m not running tomorrow anyway, might as well work all night.
- Well, i’m not running tomorrow anyway, might as well have a fudgcicle.
- Well, i’m not running tomorrow anyway, might as well have a beer.
- Well, i’m not running tomorrow anyway, might as well have a big bowl of cheeze sauce with white bread to dip it in.
- Well, i’m not running tonight anyway, might as well have a Venti Mocha with whip and drizzle.
So on Tuesday, even though I over-ate during the day I sent this to Happy Dan
Toughest 4k I have run since my first week of running. I got side cramps and I was just plain winded the whole time.
I went home and didn’t overeat anymore. I drank a bunch of water and decided I’d go run hills with group on Wednesday. I ate well in preparation for the evening run, drank a bunch of water and pretty much got head screwed on straight. It was a really good run. It was 8ish kms with 6 hill repeats in the middle of which I did 4 barefoot, and it seemed like a world away from the day before. So much better.
I had planned on running long this Sunday, but wasn't sure how much I would be able to handle, so when Darren got ahold of me to ask if I wanted to run on Saturday, just an easy run, it was a no brainer. Sure.
Like I said above, it was spectacular. Not in the sense that it was the most amazing physical/fast/efficient run I had ever completed, but it was more about me re-assuring myself that i COULD still do this. It was a mediumish speed (for me), and it was wonderful. Easy conversation about all manner of things and a little running effort.
So what is running all about for me? It about all of you, the internet people and my local running friends that I have met along the way. Darren and I happened to meet during the Frozen Ass 50 in February, and in conversation on that run, we found out we live 3 blocks away from each other. Crazy!
I had never met Darren before that race, but we ended up chatting a lot and he became one of the heroes of my race report. What an awesome guy!
So, really, what I am getting at is, that I am a runner. I need to run, but I can’t do it alone. I feel sad that my situation in life has caused me to miss some of my favorite races this spring already, but soon enough I will be back in the racing saddle, meeting new people and getting my happy fix. I feel bad for you, my loyal internet, that you have to listen to my crappy crap, but, it’s doesn’t seem to be driving anyone away, but I am sure if I carried on like this, that I would be left here alone in the wide world web, typing to myself. That’s no fun.
Anyhow. I gave a glimpse into pissed off Neil in the past few postings, but like I said, that’s not me. Those incidents are very isolated and for once, I am going to let them go… and try to focus on what I can do today to make my life better, so I can help make other peoples lives better. What do you say? Are you with me?
I lied. I am going to go back. But for good stuff. For the benefit of my new, and awesome cool kid readers, this is more like me…
these next two go together, so read the first one first…
And this isn’t the first time I have been in the dumps either. The next link is a post very similar to this one. Uncanny really.
So, I give you permission to slap me upside the internet, when you see me starting to whine and bitch about how busy and tired I am. It has been proven over and over again that I am a much better me when I am running.
Most importantly, thanks to my very lovely wife, for kicking me out the door this week. In not as many words, she said I was more of an asshole when I was not running, so please, go run, come back happy.
I did, and I am.